Saturday, November 11, 2006

Law & DIS-Order?

I heard what sounded like an urban myth this week, and being the grizzled, veteran reporter that I am, decided to investigate.

Someone told me that in the opening of Law & Order ("duh-duh-duh-DUH-DUM-DUM"), a certain male appendage shows up: a willy, Dewey the One-Eyed Worm, a phallus, a johnson, a wang, dick, or whatever one of the hundreds of other names for penis you think sounds most delicate and proper.

My attempt at finding information about it via Google was fruitless (nutless?). I record the show every Friday night, so just minutes ago, I went through the opening repeatedly, pausing on the pictures of the guys in handcuffs, which I was told is where the trouser snake supposedly appears.

Unless someone can prove me wrong, it is just as I suspected: an urban myth. No pecker shows up.

Now, the dog with the proportionately gigantic human-looking schlong in the IKEA catalogue is for real! It's as plain as the nose on your face, or (insert pee-pee reference here).

Any other urban myths we should try to debunk, you and I? Like, did Elvis really die on the toilet (the King dying on the throne: kind of poetic, ain't it?)? Or that entering your PIN backwards into an ATM will summon the police?

Bring 'em on!


Anonymous said...

Bobby, don't be a ding-a-ling...potty humor is for Ma and JB and Milky and N@...that and I don't know of any urban myths. :)Unless you've heard the one about the hussy...

Newsguy Bob said...

lol, CQ. Good for you, holding on to the bitterness. Sometimes, holding a grudge can be very therapeutic.

Anonymous said...

Bobby, if only you knew the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the

JB said...

As far as urban nmyths that need de-bunking are concerned - One of our morning shows here (we have three stations) used a story that a station producer had sent around via email, claiming it was 'true', 'the most hilarious lawyer story ever', etc.
Well, they got called on it almost immediately by a savvy listener who uses the same site I like to use to de-bunk the myths of urbanites everywhere -
If it is in doubt, will ferret it out. The story the morning show used was a variation of this story from
If you haven't been to, you're missing out.

Anonymous said... about REDRUM? Not that I've ever watched the movie,or can remember the name of it, hell, I still cannot sit through the Wizard of Oz...

Newsguy Bob said... is great.

Aside from that kind of urban myth, I like the kind that you hear about So-and-so's brother-in-law's third cousin twice removed living in an apartment, and muddy water starts dripping through the ceiling, because the family upstairs is growing vegetables on the living room floor.

N@ Lauzon said...

tube steak.